Malaysia - gua punya! - Part I

The 308 (March 8th) political tsunami are almost 5 months behind us so lets take a step back and look at the changing picture.

High-octane Rocket fuel
Our astronaut, Sheikh Muszaphar and his apparent political affiliations

DAP basically cut off the puppet strings that has been holding the state of Penang on a noose and is now reigning like Evis himself. Lim Guan Eng aka CM has been working hard at interrogating every single move by the ruling party and is getting some traction despite the governmental friction. People are responding well, especially to his pledge for CATful (competency, accountability and transparency concept) governence.

However, not all is sugar and spice - the fact that Penang's state budget has been cut by almost 80% and - as many can guess - is only the tip of the iceberg! CM's not resting on his laurels and declared a holiday in rebellion. (and may I add, totally works for me atm!) Much is to be seen how DAP battles on - no doubt with a new brand of arsenal and support - in stormy weather.

Oh and have you noticed that no one dares to bring up the ever-sensitive issue of religion against the CM? Apparently it's because it's like trying to pour water on a pan-fire - you'll get burnt and lose alot of face. But jokes aside, especially with me being here, I feel oppressed. The rakyat feel oppressed.

RM2.70

For those who drive, surely you know what I'm talking about, and for those who don't, well.. lucky you.

Agreed, I wasn't the most kiasu person out there who went out and had a picnic while waiting for my turn to pump the precious liquid gold because I almost agreed with the concept. (but lets leave the issue for another day) Problem was, it wasn't ten, it wasn't twenty, it was a FORTY percent increase in how much I'm paying to feed my white elephant. Even in Penang where the food is considered cheap (i.e. you can find charkuayteow for RM2.80) people are starting to feel the pinch. My friend doesn't even eat breakfast with us anymore. A Penangite, skipping breakfast.. imagine that. And now they want to upgrade our LRTs and reccomend cycling lanes. I wait in bated breath.

He's in the race, but coming from behind

If 308 was a tsunami, he's the surfer riding the waves. His decade long absence from the political scene has made the man stronger and hopefully wiser. He even got himself on live TV! Now, that's a milestone right there.

Just imagine, 10 years ago, people were rallying because a man got punched. Today.. he just might be the man of our tomorrow.

I could almost feel BN quiver watching his well constructed and devious plan unfold right before their eyes - and despite the cheap tricks and words, doesn't seem like they can do anything about it.

And now, the second wave will hit the shores of Malaysia, so soon you can almost feel it. Stay tuned..

Obamaism

I just watched this and I now feel like a 3rd class nation. Watch and behold.






No, I do not support Obama simply because I don't know what in the world is happening over there. *Dumb blonde moment*..Looks good though.

What's so funny?

There's quote that says, "A day without laughter is a day wasted". Seeing that I've never met anyone who simply refuses to laugh (with the exception of this clip) makes that a no-brainer.

In recent months during my SDM stint here in Penang, I've hung out with numerous people who have the exceptional ability to tickle your funny bone in an instant and i've grown envious of their entertainment capacity (not to mention their huge memory for their jokes database). Agreed, they may have the stupidest of jokes such as:

Q: How do you make an elephant bow?
A: Flick his balls.

See, I know you're going "wth" but i've seen a guy make the same joke and make 30 grown up men pee in their pants! It's all in the delivery, I know, I know.

No, I'm not going to start preaching on the technicalities of humor i.e. structures of jokes etc etc. It just bugs me simply because I'm getting confused due to the fact that different people I talk to give me absolutely contrasting responses! .. It's not funny when you try to crack a joke with your bosses and you get the 'wtf dude'-look' cuz no one fuggin gets it?! Did I mention they were my bosses? Ohshuttup,it's.not.funny.

Alright, key learning time. The truest and time-tested element of humor is (unfortunately) pain. Whether it's physical or emotional pain:
You slip on a banana! (LOL-worthy!)
I call you a banana! (Snort-worthy!)
or sometimes used to good effect - pain on self:
Say, "I lost my nuts.." (it's a pun. Nuts, as in nuts?? geddittt??!)

(Actually me pleading for laughs is embarrasing and my guess is that you at least snorted there)

A good one I've heard was this guy doing stand-up. He was hilariously going on and on and pretty hard on gays and homosexuals and he noticed that some were getting uncomfortable. (it's the US, see). So he says, "I can see some people gettin uncom-for-ta-ble. Why so serious??! What, I can't make gay jokes now?
Can I see them gays in the house? *lifts one hand* There yoall at. See, I don't know much about gays, but I sure know this; If you can take a dick in your mouth... you sure as hell can take a joke!"

Laugh and be merry people, cheers~

You ain't takin shit from me, ya hear?!

It's been awhile, but lets waive all 'preliminary hearings' about what the heck has happened to me in the past months and focus on today's post.

Yet again, it's a politically driven article that has sent me into the urge of writing again. Check :

Legend: Green - I'm for it! Yellow - Questionable.. Red - "Like W.T.F." Bolded for emphasis (duh.)

Malaysia DNA bill draws unease

A CONTROVERSY is brewing over a seemingly rushed parliamentary bill that gives enormous powers to Malaysian police and the Home Minister over the use of a person's DNA in criminal offences.

The bill was passed in principle last Thursday after opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim staged a walkout of opposition lawmakers to protest Home Minister Syed Hamid Albar's refusal to refer the bill to a select committee for further evaluation. But the disquiet was evident: some National Front lawmakers also expressed their anxiety over the legislation's sweeping reach.

For Mr Anwar, 61, the bill must seem to be a slowly unfolding horror personally directed against him. The former deputy prime minister is facing charges that he sodomised an aide in a case that will be mentioned later this week but has refused to give the police a fresh DNA sample. But the bill would make it for suspects to provide DNA samples on pain of a mandatory jail term.

Although he refused to refer the bill to a select committee, Mr Syed Hamid assured opposition lawmakers that the police would never misuse their powers and promised to resign if they ever did. 'There is no political motive,' he later told reporters. 'I think it's ridiculous that the opposition looks at everything as having a political motive.'

But critics say that the bill seemed draconian. They note, for instance, that the legislation empowers a senior policeman to be the head of the forensic DNA databank. They maintain that an independent body, and not the police which have a vested interest in convicting suspects, should handle collection, storage and testing of specimens.

Another clause in the bill allows a policeman to 'use all means necessary' when taking non-intimate DNA samples (saliva or hair samples, for instance) from a suspect. 'What does 'all means necessary' mean in the case of a suspect who is in police custody?' asks Michael Kumar Devaraj, a medical doctor and an opposition lawmaker from Perak state.

But what frightens people most is a section saying that 'notwithstanding any written law to the contrary, any information from the DNA databank shall be admissible as conclusive proof of the DNA identification in any proceedings in any court'.

Lawyers say that it seems to suggest that a suspect cannot ask for an independent review of the DNA evidence, meaning that the DNA databank's opinion cannot be reviewed in any way by a court of law.

Finally, the legislation provides complete immunity for the minister or any DNA databank personnel for any acts of commission or omission by the person 'in good faith'. The critics note that there is no mention of how leftover samples are to be disposed, implying that suspects could possibly be framed for other crimes.

'DNA testing is too powerful a tool to be placed solely in the hands of a police force that has shown bias against political opponents in the past,' says Dr Kumar. 'Make no mistake, this is a bad law with very serious implications.'

Where do I start?

Alright, first, let me admit that I barely know anything about the law (no, Boston Legal doesn't tell me enough) but I'm pretty adamant that I don't fluking like the idea of someone forcefully trying to shove a cotton bud into my mouth.. by "using all necessary means.."!

Alright, lets not kid ourselves. Since when have we started caring that much about criminal cases to bring us to passing DN fluggin A bills in less than a month?!

Oh wait..we do! Only some cases just don't have DNA, do they? (read - *BOOM*!)

CSI'd be proud I tell yah. Hmm.. maybe not when you realize all of a sudden that one day the tables turned and you're on the mistaken side of the law - the wrong one.

Greens

Remember once when you were flipping through channels and came upon the PGA American Tour? You tried to look interested and watched for abit to see what the fuss was about.

You didn't get it.

So you tried asking the people who supposedly 'got it'. I did. Feel free to compare your response with mine:

Me: Uncle, what's so fun about golf?
Golf-Crazy-Uncle (GCU) : *pause*. Well.. *pause* It's a very interesting game.
Me: Really? (my brain goes, "Reeaallly..." *rolls eyes*) What's so interesting? It's one of the smallest balls in all balls related games and all you do is use the golf stick and whack it.
GCU: NooOoOoo.... it's more than that. *pause* Nevermind, you won't understand it now. Just play it and see lah. Besides, if you wanna climb the corporate ladder, you've gotta play it. All your bosses play it.
Me: Uhuh. *pause* So uncle how's the weather?

Back to the golf game on TV. The camera zooms in unto the player. There is pindrop silence from a crowd of hundreds. The guy does a practice swing. Looks unto the sky. Looks down. Bends his knees in an awkward position. Pulls the driver back and hits the ball. Camera zooms out to catch the sight of the black dot in the skyyyy..... and greens appear suddenly and the ball roooooooolls and stops.


I didn't get it, however today, the 5th of July 2008, Justin has officially been unto the greens.

Cheers to that. More to come about golfing, you can be sure of that. :)

Back from Bangkok

Just came back from Bangkok about 3 hours ago. It's late and I'm having jetlag. And I've to wake up for work tomorrow at 7.

Crazy.

Oh, and equally crazy is I've spent about 1k on stuff in 4 days. Lol, the look on Sulyn's eyes when I showed her all the things I've bought.. accompanied with the prices of them was just like O____O". And all she can say nowadays is, "save save save.. wanna go wanna go.. Bangkok Bangkok BaaaaangggKOKKKK!!!"


Haha, had fun and now I've gotta sleep. Bangkok update soon. Tschus!

Balancing act

UPDATED as of May 20!

Hellooo blog. Yes, Justin Wong is still alive but apparently his blog doesn't show it. Why?

No big surprise that I've been busy being busy. With what? Well, for starters, I'm now in PENANG, the island of cheap charkuayteow and one way streets.

Yeah, I'm going to be based here for about 5 months meaning till approximately mid-September and will be performing the role as a Sales and Distribution Manager.

Honestly, so many things have been happening since the last time I put up that Al-Pacino clip (which I'm guessing many of you liked but not that much to expect it to remain there for months) that I don't know where to begin.

Even personally, so many things have happened that made me rethink everything again. I'm gaining ground yet am losing footing. I'm gaining trust of others yet losing it from some I value most. I'm getting pretty good in the job yet feel I'm underperforming as well. Similarly, I'm making new friends yet this same thing seems to be the weakest link when it comes to older friends.

I just can't agree with the yin-and-yang-ness of it. Something's just not right.

Hmm, I don't suppose sleeping on it will make much of a difference, will it? But that's what I gotta do for today for the betterment of tomorrow. Hmm.. why am I living today for tomorrow again?