Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Women are dangerous

Starter: This is not a post about road safety.

I know what're you thinking, it's one of those anti-feminist-filled posts. But be surprised to know, this exact phrase came from a woman, an elderly one at that. She's my grandmother.
After visiting my mother in the hospital today, (yeah, she got admitted for spraining her back and taking overly strong medication - which by the way, wasn't confirmed to be correct till the time of writing - causing extreme nausea leading us to the emergency ward at 9.45 a.m.) I had lunch with my grandma and Batman. While talking about future plans and such, the 'women' topic crept up. My grandmother preached about how 'men at this age' should not stick to one girl, and have many girlfriends. "When the time is right, and the pocket is aptly packed, then you choose..", she concluded. Having been trained to question throughout my engineering courses, I asked "Why?"

"Because women are dangerous!", says her. Then came the talk about 'girls from China' which just left me shaking my head, as though seeing flashes of TheStar frontpages in my mind.

Later that evening I met up with my ex-Semenyih-housemates and were discussing about matters close to the heart (i.e. girls, money..and stuff). One of our friends was recently involved in a very dramatic relationship with someone whom he thought the world of. Why such a dramatic word like dramatic, you ask. Well, picture this. The perfect combination of romantic scenes from TVB series (i.e. romantic moments on the rooftop, 'electricity' running so high it lights us spotlights up, sweetness that could lead to diabetes) and the all-in-one drama from Bollywood movies (e.g. 3rd parties, singlehood, love, hate, jealousy, persistence, angry parents.. minus the dance crew and the *deng-e-degechak-e-denge-deng-..* music). I feel proud to have been in such epic sequels of which we fondly referred to as Episodes I-VI.

Thing is, it was over as fast as it began.

When I heard it, my face was like [center]..
Which way would you've went?
I went both.

I always thought, the harder someone works for something, the more he/she'll appreciate and treasure it. Just like durians. You go through a mindfield to get it, face the spikes, precise aiming and brute strength just to taste the.. (seriously, just drooled inside) .. the sweetness of it all. This did not make sense as I thought this one'd last, at least for sometime.

Though I'm sparing verbal details, I'm posting this picture for you to assemble the pieces. This was drawn by this friend of mine which perfectly depicts the story. So go figure and you can comment your guesses, haha.

Now, now. This is not to say menkind is all good either. Chauvinists, perverts, jerks, sexists, pigs, asses, and the list gets wilder. Heard most of them. The main difference is that (most) men are terribly honest about it. If I'm an ass, I'll say I'm an ass. My friends know I'm an ass. A bundle of asses, we are. We admit n accept, n' get along. I know this may annoy some women as to, "Then why don't you change?!". Well, so long as it's not bad for our health, doesn't kill and/or hurt anyone, it's fine by us. What would the fairer sex do? Be honest now.

From this, I've (re)learnt a few things:
  1. Women are dangerous to a certain extent (for personal confrontation, call me and we'll have a go at this one, hah)
  2. When the going gets tough, you gotta think of yourself first i.e. survival of the fittest
  3. If it could happen to him/her, it could happen to you
  4. (as above) One thing i know for sure, is nothing's for sure
  5. Blood is thicker than water ('brothers' included =)
But all men are well versed with this phrase: Women - can't live with them, can't live without them.

Because we are men
(extracted from a joke by Allan Pease)

If we work too hard, there is never any time for her and the kids; if we don't work hard enough, we're good for nothing.
If a man gets a promotion ahead of her, that is favouritism; if she gets a promotion ahead of a man, that is equal opportunity.
If a man thumps her, that is wife bashing; if she thumps him, that's self defence.
If he asks her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination; if she asks him, it's a favour.
If we try to stay in shape, that's vanity; if we don't we're slobs.
If we buy her flowers, we're after something; if we don't, we're forgetful.
If she has a headache, it's because she's tired; if he has a headache, he doesn't love her anymore.



P.S. : On a lighter note, Happy Father's day to all fathers!
PP.SS: Btw, my mom has been discharged from the hospital now and is thankfully better now.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

sue the doctor for giving such strong medication. doctors in malaysia ALWAYS prescribed strong and unnecassary medicines. conclusion: question the doc the next time they prescribe any medicine.hahhaha...and u hav the option not to take it.

justinwong said...

Hmm, but I reckon my mom did take the medicine before. But I guess it was necessary then.
Haha, on the other hand, if the doctor beng after I question him, I'm afraid he'll do more than spit in my medicine u know...
Take also teruk, don't take also teruk.

Conclusion : It's up to you pharmacists to fix this problem!

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